This is a caterpillar making it’s lovely, fuzzy way up the front of my house. I saw it yesterday, another truly gorgeous fall day. I can’t believe how many times I have said “this is the most beautiful Fall!”. I’ve said it many, many times and will be sad when I cannot say it again.
I’ve been away. Not from my home, but from the internet. I still read from it everyday, I just haven’t posted any of my own comments or photos for a few weeks. I’m not exactly sure why, there isn’t any meaningful reason other then a break just felt like the right thing to do.
My days right now, as I’ve mentioned as often as I comment on the weather, are filled with my family and taking care of my children and their stories. And that’s just it. Their stories are not mine to tell and at the moment, I don’t have many of my own. I could write and tell you about how when I gave up Instagram I used that time to read the glorious sequel to Olive Kitteridge as well as Pema Chodron’s When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times. I could write about having an ultrasound a few weeks back with my abdomen hurt so much I thought it must be gallstones or something worse but it doesn’t seem like it was (follow up in a month because it was nothing urgent). I could write how after days of that I was eating really well and trying to do better things to take care of myself (…it mama ain’t happy..blah, blah, blah…I know), and then I woke up one morning and couldn’t move because my neck was out like it’s done before and I was cooped up in bed (watching HBO’s Olive ) and began feeling really lousy because if I’ve been taking care of everyone and trying so hard to be good to myself and this still happens, geez, well, what then?
So I’m back? Maybe. My stories aren’t exciting, they sound pretty whiny even though I’m not. And 95% of the stuff in my brain most days I can’t write about. So I’m here at the starting line of Kerry Clare’s Blog School without running shoes (did I mention I sprained my ankle exercising last week ?!) or those wrist sweatband things that would be really cool but I want to push on and just start. And I will. I wrote this didn’t I, the equivalent of the caterpillar making it’s way along the front of my house, slow and steady hoping the wind won’t blow it down.